2012年5月19日土曜日
CALL Blogging Assignment3
She is one of the most famous musicians in the world. LADY GAGA came to Japan last week. On Tuesday, she visited Tokyo Sky Tree,and weared a shining dress like aluminum. Its dress is imaged the tower. She prayed for Japan ,so many people will be fine. She said "I have never seen such a beautiful view", also she told us like that, "AISHITEMASU" in Japanese. She is making a great contribution for Japan, because she had visited Japan at first when 3.11 the large earthquake occurred.In spite of a lot of foreigners went back home countries, she came Japan. And she raised a fund for us. We are supported many things by her. We must deeply appreciate her cooperation. LADY GAGA is a great person.
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I also respect Lady Gaga for her social conscience and her support of Japan.
返信削除Below I suggest some slight changes in your nice paragraph to improve the grammar.
Lady Gaga is one of the most famous musicians in the world. She came to Japan last week. On Tuesday, she visited Tokyo Sky Tree, and wore a shining dress like aluminum. The dress had the image of the tower o it. She prayed for Japan, so many people will be fine. She said, "I have never seen such a beautiful view," also she said, "AISHITEMASU," in Japanese. She is making a great contribution for Japan because she had visited Japan soon after the large 3.11 earthquake occurred. In spite of the fact that a lot of foreigners went back home to their countries, she came to Japan, and she raised a fund for us. We are supported in many things by her. We must deeply appreciate her cooperation. LADY GAGA is a great person.
Compare this version of your paragraph with your earlier version and take note of the changes.
Thanks for your good work. Nice job!